History

Archives are back up after a reminder/prompt by estee. Looked through my own archives a bit, and i think i'm not proud of what i read. Haha. Oh well. We all grow up. And we all have histories we rather not tell people we have. Wouldn't it be nice if all there is to us is the nice saintly figure we always portray?

But behind who we are today, is a growing up process that isn't all honour and glory. Sometimes, we aren't proud of it. I think the good thing about that is, we are better now than then. And our past has shaped us into who we are today. So no shame either. I'm not proud of some of the things i've done, but i'm not ashamed of it. There are things that I ought to be ashamed of myself of, but by God's grace, He's taken it in His hands and moulded it into something quite different. It's made me who I am today, and I thank God Almighty that He's made something good out of this piece of sh*t.

Heard Junnan share this with the cell group once, it's about the traditional process of refining silver. The refiner refines the silver by heating it in the fire to melt away the impurities, and that'll make the pure silver left behind shiny, unoxidised. If the refiner overheats, then the silver is spoilt, and cannot be used for jewellery anymore (since it'll lose it's shine). Ane how does the refiner know when to stop? When he sees his own face reflected in the silver he's working on. It's a painstaking process, and only the silversmith's love for his art keeps him working in that kind of heat.

And God continually refines and transforms us. The mark of whether we have been refined is how much of God's reflection we see in us. Bit by bit, and for that, I'm grateful.